2023 Commencement Welcome from the Board of Trustees by Paul Stafford P'16, '19, '23
I’m very proud of all of you.
As a speaker at a graduation, I get the privilege of offering a few words of wisdom to the graduating class. It boils down to one word: love. Every moment of every day, Millbrook School lives and breathes its mission statement, which hangs on the words “known and needed.” To me, knowing and needing is perhaps the best way we express love for each other. Like everyone, my own children had ups and downs here. The school guided us through those times in a way that made it clear to me that they were truly seen for who they were. Our family felt known and needed and always loved. Following are some of the best additional examples I can think of.
As a speaker at a graduation, I get the privilege of offering a few words of wisdom to the graduating class. It boils down to one word: love. Every moment of every day, Millbrook School lives and breathes its mission statement, which hangs on the words “known and needed.” To me, knowing and needing is perhaps the best way we express love for each other. Like everyone, my own children had ups and downs here. The school guided us through those times in a way that made it clear to me that they were truly seen for who they were. Our family felt known and needed and always loved. Following are some of the best additional examples I can think of.
I have this insider’s view as a member of the board – I sit in on trustee meetings where love for Millbrook informs every conversation and every decision we make. We work with administrators and faculty who clearly feel the same way. When it came time for Drew Casertano to step aside after 31 years of service to the school, the board, in its infinite wisdom (and after due consideration), unanimously voted to forgo the usual nationwide search and promote one of our own. Here’s to another 28 years of Jon Downs.
A few years ago, a former student felt the love for and from Millbrook so much so that he left us a $5 million bequest. I say former student and not alum deliberately. That former student had been expelled from Millbrook.
The example nearest and dearest to my heart of the love that defines this community is the head of school’s inspired choice of Commencement speaker, Nancy Keller-Coffey, who is so beloved and admired here, including by me and my family. Nancy has taught and inspired so many of you. She is all Millbrook, all the time, and as much as anyone exemplifies the heart and soul of our culture and everything we stand for.
Every one of you seniors, whether you spent a single year or four years here, whether you thrived or struggled or both, I guarantee you that a team of thoughtful teachers, dorm parents, advisors, coaches, and administrators dedicated way more time than you know to the task of understanding you, to figuring out specifically how to help you with your growth and well-being. Remember always that that kind of love is the best renewable resource – it actually grows when we give it away.
So, you’ve done all the work. Now it’s our job to get you graduated. All you have to do is walk across the stage. Then, you’re going to get out there to your families and friends, your summer jobs, your colleges and communities, and to the world. When you do, please remember Millbrook and the love you received here; apply the lessons you learned. Know and need the people in your life and your circle. Defend them with ferocity and courage. Give them your time, your energy, your undivided attention, your kindness, and your forgiveness. Extend patience and consideration even to those you disagree with, and remember always to love yourselves. Shamelessly share the love you were given here at Millbrook. Wear your Millbrook hats and hoodies proudly, and tell everyone what your school is all about. Carry Millbrook with you in every moment of every day and walk through this world and through your lives with compassion and with love.
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A few years ago, a former student felt the love for and from Millbrook so much so that he left us a $5 million bequest. I say former student and not alum deliberately. That former student had been expelled from Millbrook.
The example nearest and dearest to my heart of the love that defines this community is the head of school’s inspired choice of Commencement speaker, Nancy Keller-Coffey, who is so beloved and admired here, including by me and my family. Nancy has taught and inspired so many of you. She is all Millbrook, all the time, and as much as anyone exemplifies the heart and soul of our culture and everything we stand for.
Every one of you seniors, whether you spent a single year or four years here, whether you thrived or struggled or both, I guarantee you that a team of thoughtful teachers, dorm parents, advisors, coaches, and administrators dedicated way more time than you know to the task of understanding you, to figuring out specifically how to help you with your growth and well-being. Remember always that that kind of love is the best renewable resource – it actually grows when we give it away.
So, you’ve done all the work. Now it’s our job to get you graduated. All you have to do is walk across the stage. Then, you’re going to get out there to your families and friends, your summer jobs, your colleges and communities, and to the world. When you do, please remember Millbrook and the love you received here; apply the lessons you learned. Know and need the people in your life and your circle. Defend them with ferocity and courage. Give them your time, your energy, your undivided attention, your kindness, and your forgiveness. Extend patience and consideration even to those you disagree with, and remember always to love yourselves. Shamelessly share the love you were given here at Millbrook. Wear your Millbrook hats and hoodies proudly, and tell everyone what your school is all about. Carry Millbrook with you in every moment of every day and walk through this world and through your lives with compassion and with love.
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